Wait, I’ve Been Here Before – Erin Lammott

Today I set out to conquer a new hike that I had never before attempted. When I got to the trail head, I recognized it instantly. I was on this trail three years ago. Previously, I only ran up the base. I turned back and didn’t do the full trail because I feared hiking it alone, I didn’t have the equipment, and mostly because I was anxious about starting a new job in a couple months so I decided to use the time to prepare for the job instead of being outside. Today was very ironic. I’m actually in the same position again. I almost decided to forego hiking today so that I could prepare for my next job. Instead I did, I guess what they call it, Carpe Diem / C’est la vie? Lived in the day. I was very struck by being on this same trail three years later. Sometimes I think nature/ God / the universe leads us back in a loop to somewhere we’ve been before to reveal more and to offer a lesson that we may have missed the last time. Today I’m back here, further down the trail. Still by myself. Learning what’s relevant for me. Receiving the healing powers that nature and the body will restore. Being reminded the end isn’t as treacherous as it may seem.

Three years ago I was sitting in this same place, but it looked so different. I was very focused in on my relationship and my upcoming job. I wouldn’t have used these words before, but I was anxious and fearful of changes I felt coming. And change sure did happen. Much has happened in the past three years. A fear then is still a fear of mine now – being lonely. And there has been loneliness. AND the past three years though have introduced me to so many new friends and also proved some relationships can last through time and distance. There’s been so much unpredicted love and many unforeseen lessons.

Today was a God moment. It was healing and restorative. I really needed that reminder to remember that one day I will be looking back at this point in my life thinking “Wow, it seemed so hard, stressful, and scary back then. And look how things have changed and where I am now.” Sometimes I wish my path was straighter, more direct, point A to point B. I guess it’s worth it though. To be led down this more winding path – maybe even back to the same trail – if it means going further down said trail and ending in way that feels how I feel today. More like myself. More confident. More assured that things will work out.  Keep trekking, E. Keep trekking, friends. It be good.

Flat Irons Trail base - 03.2018
Thanks God. Thanks nature. Thanks body. Thanks loved ones. Thanks timing.  
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Taking My Time – Anthony Suggs

Time is a funny thing. Like many things we put lots of weight into as human beings, it is a construct. It can be experienced differently depending on what is going on in your life, who you are with, what you are doing, what is in your control, and what is out of it. Time means many things to many people and, despite the exact measurements of your clock, it is relative.

January felt very fresh and exciting. The legislative session of the Colorado General Assembly convened for its 120 day period which made my job as an advocacy and social justice coordinator a little more exciting! Life was very very busy, but I felt as though I had a grasp on my time and was able to take everything in as it came and keep in the context of the bigger picture. And then February happened.

As the already hectic schedule of January continued on into February, time began to be less distinct. It began to flow together in one continuous stream; the days and weeks sort of blending together. The shortest month of the year somehow felt like it was the longest, yet I felt as though much of it was passing me by.

I don’t think I’m alone in this experience of exceptionally busy or challenging parts of life. It can be so easy to get stuck in a cycle with our lives to the point that we stop paying attention. We stop looking for the Divine in the midst of us and even within our own lives. The Holy is everywhere and when we don’t stop to check in with it, we run the risk of missing out on the bigger picture. The bigger picture that is, at the same time, beyond our individual lives and deeply rooted in the everyday of our individual lives.

So, I’ve been making a strong effort to check in with myself in March to make sure that I’m not just coasting along. I want to seek. I want to notice. I want to be present.

There’s no better time than now.